The Uncertainty of Aging – Be Prepared!

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Several weeks ago, my Mom and I took a road trip. Life for Mom is different. Life for our family is different. It has been quite a journey for us all. We learned many lessons along the way. We have weathered illnesses, hospitalizations, the loss of our Dad, falls, and surgeries. Our family has not always been on the same page, about my Mom. But today things look different. Today feels different. Our family has come together, patched up old hurts, and celebrate Mom together and in our own ways.

Today Mom lives in Independent Living in a Retirement Community. Moving to this community was not an easy decision for my Mom or some of the family. But as the main caregiver for many years, and as a nurse and patient advocate, finally having a real plan for the “what ifs” of aging, put me at ease, took away my anxiety, and enabled me to slow down, and enjoy my Mom, knowing that life is short for all of us!

Mom and I celebrate Sunday Fundays together. My brother and his wife snowbird from Vermont to spend time with her My sister lives closer to Mom now, and takes the urgent calls from Mom, with me as back up. My other brothers provide support from afar, with frequent phone calls and facetimes and visits. Her grandchildren remain connected. And I started to talk to her about advocating for herself.

It is with these plans in place, that Mom and I headed out for our 8 hours road trip so we could visit my son and his wife, and Mom’s great granddaughter. It was such a fun trip. We laughed and cried and shared many memories. We made new memories. We came home, exhausted but happy.

That is, until 3 days later. Mom started feeling bad. Sore throat. Cough. Fatigued….. Mom was on it. She had a COVID test on hand. She tested positive. I felt fine. We had a plan. Mom called the dining room to have meals delivered. She called housekeeping to make some extra visits to change her linens, and clean the bathroom. She called her doctor. She called the nurse in her community to let her know she had COVID. They delivered another COVID test. We increased our phone calls to check in and keep her company. Her many friends in the community checked in on her. It was a worrisome time, but as a family, we had a plan. She retested for COVID and was negative. But after another 10 days she still was not well.  She called her doctor and my sister delivered some antibiotics and steroids. She is finally starting to feel better!

I am so proud of my Mom. Our family weathered some very emotional times to get her to this place. I am so proud of our family! Mom knew what to do. We knew what to do. She had the support system in place, just in case. And she felt empowered to advocate for herself!

The moral of the story- When it comes to aging, be prepared. And keep enjoying life with those you love!

LORI IS EXTREMELY TALENTED!

What a great use of Lori’s talents!

I worked with Lori for several years during my career as an orthopedic surgeon. I know her to be not only compassionate and understanding but also a tireless advocate for what is right.

In difficult situations she was unwavering in her quest to enable me to provide the best possible care for my patients. She knows the system and how to work through it (and around it whenever necessary

LORI JUMPED RIGHT IN

If you are in need of a patient advocate, I would highly recommend Lori Schellenberg. She is extremely knowledgeable, effective, and professional. Knows when to be strong and forceful yet loving and caring with your loved one and your family. I was concerned about an elderly family member who had several severe falls, was forgetting to take medication, not eating healthy and not keeping up with housekeeping yet insistent she was fine and staying in her home. Even though Lori lived out of state she made phone calls on our behalf, made several recommendations to help us provide what our loved one needed and was an intermediary when it was necessary. Lori’s knowledge of geriatrics, continuous care/assisted living facilities, the health care system, long term care insurance and hospice is invaluable. She helped us put together a plan that provided the best and continuous care necessary for our loved one and our family. We are extremely thankful for her help and look forward to continuing to work with her as our loved one moves through the next phases of her life’s journey, thus enabling us to create loving memories.

LORI JUMPED RIGHT IN

My husband underwent nasal surgery 6 months ago, after he had a negative sleep study test and was referred to an ENT doctor due to continued fatigue and snoring.

Unfortunately, he developed two different serious infections, and we were concerned about his ongoing treatment with the ENT. In fact, we were very anxious because he wasn’t getting better but the surgeon was not clear with us as to what to do next.

When describing what was going on, Lori jumped right in, when she found out my husband was actually at the surgeon’s office at that time, and still did not understand the situation. She recommended that my husband ask to have the surgeon come back into the room, and to call her so that she could speak to the surgeon with my husband in the room. Lori was very professional and knowledgeable in her approach with his surgeon. She established a treatment plan, in a way that my husband could understand, and why this was the plan. She also discussed the “what ifs” the current treatment plan did not work. He ordered further tests to be completed prior to his next appointment, if he did not improve.

She followed up with my husband and I to make sure we understood the plan.

By advocating for my husband, Lori relieved a lot of anxiety and stress that this current medical concern was causing, and they felt more confident in the surgeon’s care.

We highly recommend Lori and Stepping Stone Advocacy Services, if you are experiencing a medical condition, and don’t know where to turn for answers. She is experienced and professional, yet able to discuss medical terms in a way that we understood.